This heart question is key to building resilience.

In this post, you will: One heart question determines your resilience.

Coach U questions to help you answer this question. I start this post with a testimony I heard many years ago. There was a man who decided to volunteer at a local psychiatric hospital. During his time at the hospital, there was one patient who was kept in a darkened isolated room. Upon inquiry, the man was told that this patient continued to hurt themselves when the lights were on, and they had to pad the room for the safety of the patient. The man asked day after day to go into the room to serve the patient and eventually, the hospital staff allowed the man to enter the darkened room. The man mustered all the courage that he could and entered the room trusting that the Holy Spirit would lead him to serve this patient. When the man entered, he decided to do one thing...

Every person on earth no matter your race, culture, background, or upbringing has one central question that all of us ask, “Am I loved?”

This question is asked until we are convinced either that we are not loved or that we are loved. Within resilience, this question is continually asked like a siren that goes off inside us, “Am I loved?!” Many people try to answer this question in different ways, seeking the answer in destructive behaviours, habits, or people. Yes, you read correctly, the answer to the one central question that bolsters our resilience, “Am I loved?” cannot be found through people. We may think that people can answer this question, but the result is dependency and emotional consumer behaviours that manipulate and ultimately hurt those around us. So, where do we answer this question?

In my life, I have ministered to thousands of people and the only person that can answer the question “Am I loved?” is Jesus.

The biggest breakthroughs, and resilience that I have witnessed in people, in the close to twenty years of cross-cultural ministry is when the question “Am I loved?” is answered, “Yes, Jesus loves me.” There is no other answer that satisfies and convinces people to forge ahead when their worlds are crumbling around them, like being convinced of the love of Jesus.

Our story continues … The man entered the room, the patient screaming, crying out, and hitting the walls. The man decided to sit on the floor of the darkened room and sing the simple song “Yes...Jesus loves me, Yes…Jesus loves me, Yes...Jesus loves me, the Bible tells me so.” The man kept repeating this song day after day when he visited the patient. The patient started to become calmer and calmer, as each day passed and after a couple of months the patient was discharged from the hospital, normal.

The biggest crisis that people face today is not the economy, relationships, wars, or even famine. The biggest crisis is that people are not convinced that Jesus loves them. The two reasons I believe are first, not circumstances but rather a belief that we are in a transactional relationship with Jesus. Or in other words, my performance dictates how much and even if Jesus loves me. Second, a transactional relationship is also fuelled by the belief that the love of Jesus equals financial abundance and overindulgence.

How do we become convinced that Jesus loves us?

Romans 6: 23 “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus our Lord.”

This verse in Romans speaks about the acceptance of the gift of God, which is salvation and the wages, referring to works, that lead us to sin.

To be convinced that Jesus loves us is to be surrendered to His love.

When I live in surrender to His love, I can boldly proclaim with the author of Hebrews, “…the Lord is my helper. What can man do to me.” This surrender means that even if I lose everything in life, I have Jesus. When I am in the darkest moment of my life, Jesus is there with me. The key is, we need to continually be reminded and encounter the love of Jesus to remain surrendered to His love. Our role is not to earn His love but to create moments to surrender to it.

Coach U

A pro tip, for you, is not to sit in self-condemnation thinking about how you are not spending enough time with Jesus. Rather move forward, be intentional about the time before you not the time behind you.

• How can you create moments to surrender to Jesus’ love this week?

• How can you involve your family in these times of surrender?

• If you feel empty in your prayer time, ask Jesus to reveal His love to you.

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